Comments on: Your Take: How do you deal with “Splitting the check?”

By: J. Money

J. Money — Wed, 10 Jun 2015 02:02:13 +0000

In reply to Barb.

Hey! You found an old one here, but a great one. So glad it helps out! If you ask for a separate check from the start, you don’t even have to bring anything up if you don’t want to – the others can then do as they choose :) Though I’d probably say something myself if it’s really bothering me. There’s no shame in all watching your $$$ whether you can afford it or not. It’s all about *smart* spending and prioritizing.

So good luck! Throw the $$ you’ll now be saving into investments every meet-up, and let it help you reach financial freedom faster :) Much better than on someone else’s alcohol!

By: Barb

Barb — Tue, 09 Jun 2015 23:02:09 +0000

Am so glad I found this article because I’ve been steaming for years over having to “subsidize” one woman in our group of 3, who constantly belittles people who want to “split the check”, while she’s boozing her guts out with 3 -4 drinks, in addition to profiting by my generosity in keeping my stupid mouth shut all these years. (All I drink is water.) Never wanted to make it an issue because I really like the other woman who is nice and reciprocating, and whom I love to see and don’t mind absorbing her 1 -2 drinks. The last time I coughed up an extra $25 to cover their drinks. One poster said it wasn’t a big deal about the $. To me, it’s the principle of how these freeloaders come up with passive-aggressive remarks or try to lay a guilt trip on you so that you’ll split the bill evenly……(like, “I can’t stand people who pick out what they had/didn’t have; it’s easier to split everything down the middle”.) Yep, I’m just as guilty for enabling the situation……but no more. (Reading other posts w/ the words, “subsidizing” and “exploiting” have ignited my resolve.) Am growing thick-skinned and will tell them before we meet again that I have to watch my budget and will need to get separate checks from now on. Thanks to all posters for the share and support! (By the way, the skinflint’s name is Dianne!!)

By: J. Money

J. Money — Mon, 10 Nov 2014 19:09:53 +0000

You found an oldie but goodie article here, thanks for chiming in :)

By: BJ

BJ — Sun, 09 Nov 2014 18:44:26 +0000

So wait…..you went out with boss and co-workers and so you most likely had to subsidize drinks, appetizers, that the boss consumed? Sorry, but higher-ups should not expect that others will subsidize their expensive choices.

It would be awkward in this lame work situation, so if I didn’t want to bring up splitting the check, then I would def. order extra things….even if I just took a few bites and then had to get doggy bags. Just don’t be overly obvious about it. I know this only increases the total bill overall, thus you’re still paying even more. But at least you will feel you received closer to what you paid for and can enjoy an extra leftover meal/take home dessert out of it.

I think most people who want to split the bill have no consideration for others’ financial situation or they are fully aware other people are subsidizing their meal. Anyone notice that the person who orders an appetizer and water is NEVER the one who suggests to split the bill? Why would someone offer to spend an extra $25 on everyone else? I can buy a nice large bottle of vodka for that price to enjoy for myself.

It’s always the guy who ordered all courses and drinks who wants to split the check. To me, it shows they have a shady character and that would be the end of my friendship.

I think it is ridiculous for other people at the table to be offended and roll eyes just because someone is paying only for what they ordered. I also don’t do the “I’ve got the tab this time crap.” Yeah, you picked up the lunch tab and the next time it’s dinner and drinks…so it’s my turn….I don’t think so. I’ll pay for my stuff, you pay for your stuff

And no, splitting the check doesn’t always eventually even out over time. Most likely the same people get subsidized over and over again. It defeats the whole purpose of trying to go out to eat on a budget. If I am on a budget I may just bring a few mini bottles of liquor I can sneak off and drink for a $1 a piece. Why would I then turn around and help pay for $8 Margaritas someone else drank? And why in the world does the Margarita drinker actually feel like it’s okay to ask me to pay for it??

The only time the check should be split is if everyone at the table is indulging and sharing apps/desserts, same bottles of wine, etc. And if all of the entrees are in a reasonably close price range of each other.

By: J. Money

J. Money — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 21:45:59 +0000

Wow, had nooooo idea some places can divide up appetizers! That’s hot. Although I’d feel like a jack-ass bringing it up, haha…. Thx for sharing w/ us Valerie! Have a great weekend :)

By: Valerie

Valerie — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 17:11:01 +0000

I have to say, from my experience as a server if you say ‘we’d like separate checks please’ from the beginning, it isn’t a hassle at all. I would just write each order separated by a line. It gets more confusing if you wait until the end, but if you’re patient with your server, it shouldn’t be a big deal there either. Also, in the places I’ve worked, if you split an appetizer, the computer system usually allows you to split the item into fractions (“1/4 Mozzarella Sticks” for example). I know every place isn’t like this, but many are.

Also, almost every time I go out with a group, the first thing the server asks is “Will this be on one bill or separate?” so the idea that it would be a problem is confusing to me.

By: J. Money

J. Money — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 19:43:43 +0000

I hear ya man – gotta change up the game depending on who’s sitting at that table with ya :) Love your icon there too – funny!

By: logan

logan — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 17:43:35 +0000

Great article.. I am usually lucky, and the check comes out quite close. People who drink a lot usually will open a separate tab for their drinks.. but what happens a lot to me is when people just start throwing in their share, but forgetting about taxes/tip… it happened to me a few times where certain people would be paying a lot more for other peoples taxes/tips.

ugh.. i ask for a separate check all the time these days, unless it is with really good friends.

By: The Best Money Blog

The Best Money Blog — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 17:45:02 +0000

Those are two awesome tactics, both of which are seemingly innocent and would work perfectly.

By: J. Money

J. Money — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 14:36:36 +0000

I think that’s great Frustrated & Frugal, glad you got something out of all this :) Have a most blessed weekend!